


Jekyll and Hyde

by SoU2019



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Angst, Ed is 18, Guilt, Happy Ending, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rutting, S0Uarchive, Self-Hatred
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-03-17 10:09:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28972608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoU2019/pseuds/SoU2019
Summary: Roy couldn’t move. He couldn’t breathe, and he couldn’t look away from those terror-stricken eyes. What had he done!?
Relationships: Edward Elric/Roy Mustang
Comments: 11
Kudos: 114





	Jekyll and Hyde

The sunlight bathing the room felt warm and comfortable, there was the sound of early morning traffic, and the occasional twitter of birds who gathered on the electrical wires to gossip. It should have made for a wonderful morning, but there was an underlying tension radiating from the body lying beside him. 

Slowly, memories of the night’s events came back to him in vivid detail, and with heart stopping horror Roy jerked up into a sitting position. The sudden movement made the human shaped lump of blankets flinch and Roy could only look on with a growing sense of nausea deep in his chest.

Silence reigned for long enough for Roy to begin to hope that he imagined the whole ordeal. Maybe Ed hadn’t come over last night, maybe he hadn’t physically restrained the boy, and maybe he had dreamt the terror in those eyes as they tried to look for the exit.

The blankets lay still for long enough for him to begin to believe the lies he was telling himself, but then there came the barest hint of a shift, and the silence was broken by the sound of springs shifting under a warm body. First, a tenuous hand moving fabric a few inches, as if testing whether the movement would be forcibly stopped. Next, there was the slow movement of a leg towards the edge of the bed, followed by a hesitant hand that pulled down the mound of fabric to reveal a panic-stricken face that looked upon him in absolute dread.

Roy couldn’t move. He couldn’t breathe, and he couldn’t look away from those terror-stricken eyes. What had he done!? This man--this boy, had already been through so much, had trusted no one, and already had so many nightmares that he regularly came into the office looking like utter crap. What had he done!?

He watched as Ed continued to slide towards the edge of the bed, not once taking his eyes off him, as if he was backing away from a dangerous monster who he had fought and barely managed to escape with his life. The instant Ed’s automail made contact with the ground, Roy could see a flicker of hope in those terrorized eyes, and Ed made a slightly faster move to get off the bed only to freeze when Roy felt himself jerk forward to stop his omega from leaving. Ed flinched so hard he might have pulled a muscle when Roy’s hand reached out to grab his, and Roy instantly withdrew, the acid beginning to burn at the back of his throat. Ed took this opportunity to scramble to his feet, his nude body displaying the violence of their encounter in a multitude of colours. His hands were in front of him in a defensive position, and he took a miniscule step backwards looking at him like he was waiting for an attack.

Once again, Roy felt the unstoppable flood of self-loathing was over him, as he watched the man he had raped inch out of his room, like an injured animal seeking to escape a beast. Ed didn’t stop to pick up his clothes, he didn’t stop to tie his hair away from his face, and he certainly didn’t stop to look for the door. He simply backed out until his back hit a wall, and then he slid along it until the frame of the door made him reach backwards for the doorknob. In the blink of an eye, Ed was out of the room, and scrambling towards the front door. The sounds of stomping automail had not even hit the tile of the entrance way when the nausea became too much, and Roy heaved the contents of his stomach onto the unfortunate duvet.

* * *

Roy stands in front of the apartment building where he had spent so many long nights discussing his plans with Hawkeye, and dreaming of a world where Amestris cultivated peace and acceptance rather than war and hatred. Those were dreams of the past, now he could only taste blood on his tongue, and smell the sweetly sick aroma of a submissive omega, who was unable to fight back, and who looked upon him like he was the most disgusting human being to exist. 

He wraps his second favourite coat around himself. The fact that his favourite trench coat was missing from its place on the coat rack is both a source of solace and a cruel reminder of Ed’s hasty exit.

“Roy!” Riza Hawkeye exclaims as he pushes past her to stand in the middle of her apartment.

She looks at him, her expression going from worried to fearful. “Roy?” She says, “What’s wrong?”

“You promised to keep me inline.” He says, looking at her and hoping she sees the rot and gore in his chest that he feels so easily, “To shoot me if I became too much like the men we hate.”

She nods, her expression blank.

“I began my rut 2 days ago.” He says.

She nods.

“I stayed home. I didn’t leave the house.”

She nods, her hands twitching.

“Ed broke in, hell if I know why, but I found him.”

Her face pales, and he watches as she steps backwards, her hand reaching towards the drawer where she keeps her guns.

“I--” His voice cracks in a way it hasn’t for decades. “I could smell his pheromones, he is an omega, he just hasn’t presented yet.” His eyesight blurs as tears well up in his eyes. “I fucked him. I held him down and fucked him until he couldn’t fight me anymore. He tried to escape, but I didn’t--I--” He chokes on the bile rising in his throat before falling to his knees and reaching blindly for the small garbage can by the desk. He retches into it, and for the third time this morning he tries to expel the self-disgust out of himself. It doesn’t work.

When he finally looks up he sees Hawkeye standing over him, a gun barrel pointed directly at his head. He gingerly places the can to the side, and bows his head in acceptance. She can shoot him, he has crossed a line and become what he hates, a tyrant who uses force to subdue those he wants to abuse. The cool steel touches his head, and he could swear he feels Hawkeye’s pulse through the vibrations of the metal.

He expects a loud bang, or perhaps just a blinding pain before a blissful nothingness. He does not expect the violent kick to the gut that leaves him gasping on the floor, rolling onto his back in a desperate bid for air. He doesn’t expect the unmoving pressure of the slippered foot pressing down onto his chest, as Riza Hawkeye glares down at him in fury.

“Death is too good for you.” She says, her gaze cold. “A corpse can’t help me repay Ishval for my sins.” The foot presses down harder, “I’ll kill you once Ishval has been fully repaid.”

Roy stares up at her, panic rising as he realizes that he is going to have to learn to live with himself for a little longer. He can’t! How is he supposed to live when he knows that he took what remained of Ed’s innocence and butchered it? There isn’t enough alcohol in the world to drown out his memories of Ed’s face as he exited his room!

“And you’ll do it sober.” Hawkeye finishes, the pressure of her foot increasing. “I will not have you drinking or using anything to drown out the pain you caused.” The glare is positively lethal, “Edward has suffered so much more in 18 years than any one person deserves, and then you go and add to that kid’s pain? Fuck you.” She finishes with a sharp kick that knocks the wind out of him.

She’s right. He doesn’t deserve a quick death. Being skinned alive might be more appropriate, and he would gladly take that option over continuing with his pathetic life right about now, but even then he would be getting off easy. 

* * *

The office is unusually quiet as it has been for the last three days. Hawkeye only spends the bare minimum amount of time in his presence, and the men have been too scared to ask what has happened. Ed hasn’t been in all week, and they are all beginning to suspect that there is some correlation between Hawkeye’s fury, Roy’s lifelessness, and Ed’s absence. Their suspicions are confirmed when Ed arrives at the office, dressed head to toe in his uniform. He isn’t ushered into Roy’s office, instead Roy is called out into the main office. Breda and Havoc look worried, and Falman is pretending to work.

“Colonel Mustang, Sir.” Ed says, his voice steady and without a hint of a waver.

“Major Elric.” Roy acknowledges.

“I am submitting my formal resignation from the Amestrian military.” Ed says, as he pulls out a few crumpled sheets from his pocket. “Any severance pay can be directed towards the post office in Resembool, they will get it to me.”

He takes the papers while making sure to keep his distance. They are covered in Ed’s distinctive chicken scratch, but there is a particular jaggedness to the letters that suggest an unusually shaky hand. He feels his throat clenching. He had taken a crippled child, who had been through hell, and turned him into a dog of the military, he had then sent that child around the country on missions that stripped away any remaining innocence, and then he had held that same child, who was now a man, down onto his living room floor, and chiselled away at any potential remaining innocence. Was there any of Ed’s suffering that he hadn’t taken advantage of?

“Thank-you for submitting the paperwork.” Roy manages to say, “I will make sure to get it processed immediately.”

“Sir.” Ed replies, his eyes barely meeting his.

Roy looks at him, standing here in his barely used uniform, with perfect posture, and a solid 5 feet between them. He almost can’t believe that this is really happening. “Thank-you for your service Fullmetal.” He says, the words scraping like sandpaper on his tongue.

“Am I dismissed?” Ed asks stiffly.

He nods, “Dismissed.”

Ed tries to make bolting look casual, but the urgency in his steps is too obvious to ignore.

“Fullmetal!” He calls out, not realizing he has even spoken.

Ed flinches, but halts his pace.

There is so much Roy wants to say, but all the words in the world can’t vocalize the sentiment he is trying to convey. Instead, the only words that can escape his lips are “I’m so sorry, I--I’m sorry.”

Ed doesn’t turn around, he doesn’t look at him, and he certainly does not answer. Instead, he stands there, frozen in place, until he is sure he isn’t about to be tackled to the ground, and then immediately bolts out of the office, and out of Roy’s life.

He can hear his men whispering, he can even make out the words ‘doesn’t that smell like Omega?’ but he doesn’t know who is speaking, and he doesn’t care. He wants to chug enough whiskey to shut down his vital organs, but Hawkeye is right, death is too good for the likes of him.

* * *

**The First Year:**

Roy doesn’t sleep, and he doesn’t drink. Instead of being invited out to the pub every Friday evening, he is left alone in his office while his men pack their bags, and discuss who beat who at bowling the previous week. They don’t talk to him. He doesn’t know what Hawkeye has said, but he suspects that they have not requested reassignment, because Hawkeye is still there. Hawkeye is their compass, if she hasn’t shot him it's because she still believes in him, and so the rest of the men follow her lead even if they have their own doubts.

A month after the incident, he is called up to North City for a meeting, and upon his return he is met with the smouldering remains of what used to be his house. The firemen on the scene seem to think it was an electrical fire, but he can see the faint traces of fire alchemy, and he knows that only Alphonse Elric would be able to teach himself fire alchemy and use it with such precision that not a single blade of grass on the neighbour’s lawn is singed. Hawkeye arranges to get him a hotel, and he resigns himself to long discussions with his insurance company.

**The Second Year:**

Hawkeye has begun to laugh at his occasional jokes, she still watches him with distrusting eyes, but there has been a return to their old dynamic over the last few months. They don’t spend time together outside of work, and Roy misses the easy comradery they used to have, but he doesn’t begrudge her distancing herself from him. Instead, he buries himself in his work. The promotion to Brigadier General is undeserved, but useful, and he uses it to begin restoring Ishval. Every time he visits the East, he is greeted by new buildings and laughing children. Hawkeye smiles.

Between the meetings, and the visits to Ishval, Roy finds himself studying law. It is criminally unfair that Omegas are required to pay for their own sexual health needs, and that they are rarely, if ever, found to be victims of sexual violence. The general views are that Omegas are built for pleasure, and that they get their pleasure from violence. If that were true, Ed wouldn’t have looked at him like he had. Ed would have begged for more, rather than begging for him to stop. Ed would still be on his team.

It takes a long time, but finally he presents his case to the Brass, and to his surprise, he isn’t laughed out of the room.

**The Third Year:**

It is exhausting, but he has finally managed to convince enough people to support his recommended amendments to the treatment of Alphas and Omegas in court. The upper echelons are mostly Alphas and Betas, but by sheer persistence, and several tugs at their heart strings, Roy manages to convince the brass to agree to let the university conduct a study and to revisit the laws that are so biased against Omegas.

Nothing changes overnight, but anything is better than the knowledge that even if Ed had wanted to take legal action against him, he would not have stood a chance, as the courts always find Omegas guilty by their sheer existence. If he can’t overturn the entire system, he will at least ensure that abortion, birth control, and sexual education are more widely and freely available. 

Some nights he wakes up to the sound of a baby crying, and his mind flashes to Edward, who was unpresented, yes, but he was also at that age where he could have presented at any time. He could have gotten pregnant on that night. The thought makes Roy shudder. Maybe that’s why he left. Maybe that’s how Alphonse found out. 

The baby belongs to his neighbours, and Roy desperately wishes they would move away.

* * *

He sits at the bar, nursing his one allotted drink of the week. Perry, the owner, has kept a special eye on him, and keeps his promise to limit his drinks. In return, Roy pays the astronomical prices for the non-alcoholic beverages they serve once his drink is gone. It's busy, as usual, but there are plenty of seats at the bar, and a handful of unoccupied booths. Roy can see Martha and her wife playing cards in the back corner, and George trying desperately to seduce his newest date. Marlon is having a great time, going by the amount of laughter coming from his table, and even the shy Evelyn seems to have found a date for tonight.

Roy had never wanted to turn into one of the old men who sit on a bar stool and chat to every person who walks in, but he has been lonely, and even people like him need some social interaction that goes beyond stilted office conversations. It’s more than a little sad and desperate, but he can’t help the basic human need for a connection, even the most superficial one is more than he deserves, but needs. He takes a swig of his drink, and looks over to Evelyn, she is smiling at her date as they chat about whatever it is young kids chat about these days, when a flash of gold catches his eyes. The booth behind Evelyn has two men, one a tall, burley man with dark hair, and the other a bit shorter with golden hair, and equally golden eyes.

His heart stops beating and the world stills. How did he not see him before? Yes, his back is turned, but that hair is so distinctive! How did he miss it? The yellow eyes are locked on him, and Roy feels the earth give way beneath his stool. He wants to die, he wants to run away from this as fast and as far as his legs will allow. He does not want to see the man he injured so grievously only a few years ago. Over the years he had managed to stuff that pain into a box so deep within him that he wasn’t even sure it could be opened without displacing all of his organs. He had hurt Ed in ways that he could not even begin to imagine, and the shame was all consuming.

His apprehension skyrocketed as Ed waved a hand at his companion, as if dismissing him, and rose to slide out of the booth. One minute Ed was sitting on the other side of an unremarkable bar, and the next he was settling into the stool beside him.

“Mustang.” Ed says, the casual tone slightly stiff.

“Edward.” Roy replies in awe that he is even capable of speaking.

“You look pretty much the same.” Ed says, waving the bartender over.

“You’ve grown.” It Is the only thing Roy can say that doesn’t end with him on his knees begging forgiveness that he doesn’t deserve.

“Yep.” Ed grins, and Roy’s world narrows down to its brilliance. “I’m finally taller than Winry.”

“How is Miss. Rockbell?” Roy asks, downing the rest of his drink in the hopes that it will make his life easier. It doesn’t.

“Winry’s good.” Ed says, “She’s getting married to Al next year. They are gonna have the cutest babies.” He smiles brightly, then grimaces, “Unless Winry calls the whole thing off because I refuse to be her bridesmaid.”

“I would imagine you would be the Best Man.” Roy says.

“Yeah, but Al has friends, Winry has Paninya and Den, who is a dog and is already going to be the flower girl. If she got her head out of the gear box for 2 minutes, she might actually have friends, but nooo she prefers to be covered in grease than go out for drinks.”

Roy barely suppresses a dangerously fond smile, “Aren’t you being a bit hypocritical of her workaholic tendencies?” He asks.

“Eh.” Ed shrugs. “Alchemy is cool. Automail is just--transport.”

“Would you rather use crutches?”

“No! I just mean that alchemy is a hell of a lot more fun than automail, alchemy is awesome, automail hurts like a bitch.”

“Well, Miss, Rockbell has never had to experience the pain for herself, so perhaps that is why she likes it so much.” Roy says, silently gawking at how normal this conversation has been so far.

Ed looks at him, there is a wariness in those eyes, but it's not fear. Roy doesn’t know what it is. “How have you been?” He asks, smiling at Perry as he receives his bright blue drink.

Roy considers his answer. The honest answer of  _ ‘barely alive. _ ’ is too close to the truth, and his go to ‘just fine, thank you’ rings hollow even in his own head.

“I’ve been---busy.”

“Yeah, no shit.” Ed says, “Since when did you turn into an omega rights activist? Between the shit going on in Ishval, and the legislation you’re pushing through here, I’m surprised you even have time to get a drink.”

The image of a terrified, retreating Ed fills his mind, and he chokes on his answer, “It’s work.”

Ed tilts his head inquisitively, his gaze assessing, and his body language tensing slightly, “Is it because of me?” He asks.

If anyone was capable of dying on the spot, it would be him. Unfortunately, the universe, like Hawkeye, doesn’t think he deserves a quick and painless death, so he ends up simply staring at Ed, trying to say everything he has been thinking for the past 3 years with just his eyes.

He opens his mouth, but nothing comes out, and he feels the defeat and the shame of the past weighing down on him. The golden eyes are still locked on him, and he is itching to get away, but the weight of his thoughts keep him glued to the bar stool. Beside him Ed’s shoulders slump, and he presses his hands into his face for a second before picking up his drink and swinging it back in one gulp. Ed throws a few bills on the bar, and turns to him.

“Hey, let’s go somewhere quieter, I think we need to talk.”

If a train had blown its whistle directly into his ear, Roy would not have heard it, as his whole world had compressed to the size of a fully grown Edward Elric. Nothing else mattered, and he vaguely heard himself tell Perry to add his drinks to his monthly tab. In a dream-like haze he follows Ed out onto the street and down a few pathways, until they were seated at an abandoned gazebo on the far side of Central City park. Very few people ventured into the park at night, as a series of muggings had left the people too scared to go anywhere near it after dusk. It was remarkably peaceful, and Ed gestured to the floor of the gazebo, as there were no benches or tables nearby. Roy follows Ed’s lead, and settles down on the well-worn flooring.

“Okay.” Ed began, “Look, I’ve thought a long time about what I would say to you if I ever saw you again, and I think I have finally figured out what that is.”

Roy tensed, but said nothing.

Ed ran a hand through his bangs, “Okay, I know what happened last time wasn't--good, but I don’t think you understand what exactly was ‘not good’ about the whole thing.”

A hoarse laugh came out of Roy’s mouth, and Ed rolled his eyes, “Shut up. Look. I’ve been reading about your pro-omega stuff in the papers, and it got me thinking about what must have triggered your sudden interest in omegas.” Ed waves a hand at him, “You were always obsessed with fixing Ishval, and you have been doing that, but I had never heard you mention omega issues until after the thing that happened.”

“I raped you.” Roy’s monotone voice says.

Ed flinches at the word, “Kinda, yeah, but it’s more complicated than that.” He flicks a pebble to the side, “That whole month I had been feeling ‘off’ I knew I was going to present as an omega, and I was trying to forget. Anyways, I just got twitchier and twitchier until I decided to leave the dorms. I couldn’t read, I couldn’t spar, and I certainly couldn’t find someone to fuck, so instead I wandered around Central.”

“I don’t know why or how I ended up at your place, but I think it's because I’ve had a stupid crush on you forever, so my best guess is that my body was preparing to find a mate for my first heat.” Ed looked at the ground. “I didn’t know you were in rut, and I didn’t even really know what that meant. When I went to your place I expected to find you and pick a fight over something stupid, because I like it when you get mad. Instead, I ran into you in rut, and it was terrifying.”

Roy wants to say something, he wants to apologize, but he can’t interrupt.

“It was like you had been cloned, but your heart and soul had been switched out with those of a stranger. You looked at me, and I didn’t see a trace of the person I liked, and that scared me.” Ed turns his face away, “I was looking for Roy Mustang, but I found an alpha who looked at me like he was going to cut me into pieces. I was scared, so I fought back, but you are freakishly strong, and I was less than a week away from my first heat, so it wasn’t a fair fight because I’m pretty sure that heats literally sap away all physical strength.” Ed takes in a shuddering breath and turns back to him, “I desperately wanted to have sex with you, but instead an alpha had sex with me, and I couldn’t get away. I didn’t want you to stop, I wanted the alpha to stop, but that's not how biology works.”

The memories of the night haven’t faded much, and the feelings remain pretty much the same. He remembers the lust, the need, the conquest and the tight heat. He remembers the events, and he feels the same thrill that still makes his cock twitch as the alpha brain luxuriates in its success, but he also remembers the pain, the regret and the betrayal of trust that he knows Ed suffered. Logically he knows he was the perpetrator, but he also feels like an outsider to the whole debacle. His therapist had reassured him that this was perfectly normal, but that didn’t take away the guilt he felt and the hurt Ed had endured.

“After I resigned I went home and dealt with my first heat.” Ed shudders, “It was awful, and the only thought I had that was coherent enough to make sense was that ‘I need to fuck something now!’ I didn’t care if it was Old Goat Guy, or Mrs. Hebble from the post office, I didn’t care. I needed an alpha, and Mrs. Hebble might be an asshole who is hella stingy, but she is an alpha and I needed to knot.” Ed makes a face, “I still hate myself for even considering those people as options, but I was in heat. Luckily Pinako locked the house down, and I survived by not jumping off the roof head first, but I couldn’t stop thinking about just how mindless I was during the worst of it.” He sighs, “Made me think of what happened that night, and I began to understand.”

“No.” Roy protests, “Edward, it's different for alphas, ruts aren’t the same as heats, we have more control, we--”

“Like FUCK you do!” Ed shouts, “Control is an illusion. Alpha’s think they are in control, but Roy! I saw you! You weren’t in control, the alpha is just as much a slave to ruts as omegas are to heats! If you had had any sort of control you wouldn’t have fucked me!”

“I-” 

“NO! Shut Up!” Ed says harshly, “Fuck you, and listen. You have been beating yourself up all this time for something you had no control over. I broke into your house, and like an idiot, didn’t notice the alpha smell. I was looking for you so that maybe I could rile you up so much you spanked me till I came, but no, instead I ran into an alpha that my body recognized even if I didn’t.” Ed was leaning closer, his hands clenched into fists. “It shouldn’t have happened, but it did, and you have done everything in your power to help push for the improvement of omega rights, which is so fucking you that I can’t even hate you anymore.” Ed looks so earnest that Roy wants to cry. “Roy, you might have liked it more than I did, but I heard you vomiting before I left the house, and I’m not a fucking idiot, I know what misplaced guilt looks like.” Ed sits back, crosses his arms, and looks defiantly at him.

Roy wants to argue, he wants to protest, he wants to lash out until Ed agrees that his is wrong, but instead of angry words, or well constructed arguments, all that comes out of his open mouth is a choking sob.

It's not dignified, and it is certainly not what he intended to do, but the sob is followed by an uncontrollable tremble, that makes him curl his arms around his legs in an attempt to keep himself together. It doesn’t work, and he feels himself begin to shatter.

* * *

The comforting embrace and the warm body are the first things Roy makes note of as the panic attack subsides. It has been years since he has felt arms around him, and even longer since he felt so secure. The person smells like wood and lilacs, and Roy wants nothing more than to bury his face into their hair and never move again. Unfortunately that is when he realizes that the hair isn’t just any hair, it's the golden strands of sunshine that he has only ever seen on the heads of three individuals, one of which is dead, and the other burned down his house.

He braces himself for the flood of shame and self-hatred that has become so intrinsic to his nature over the years, but it never comes. Instead, the quiet humming sound coming out of Ed’s throat is soothing, and reminds him of Eastern folk music. Three years of repressed emotions have begun to leak out of him, and finally he feels the pressure inside him lessen.

“Better?” Ed asks, his face looks tired, and he pushes away slightly.

Roy nods, his throat feels too raw to properly pronounce words.

“You look like shit,” Ed says, “Lets get you home.” He stands, and gently hauls him up to his feet.

The world teeters, and the stars spin as Roy tries to find his balance, but between the salt soaked eyes, and the dry throat, he can’t seem to see or get in enough air to properly breathe. Ed is still holding his hands, and trying to steady him while Roy gathers enough saliva to whisper his address. Ed takes his arm, and they both step out of the gazebo, and onto the soft midnight grass.

* * *

“New house?” Ed asks, looking at the place he had bought with the insurance money.

“Yes,” Roy replies, “I believe your brother likes to commit arson as revenge.”

Ed goes still for a moment, “Fuck.”

“Hmm.” Roy agrees.

Ed turns to him, “Al set your house on fire!?” He hisses.

Roy nods, “I suppose after a decade of seeing the symbol on my gloves he finally figured out how I do it.” He shrugs, “He did a remarkably good job, the insurance company is convinced it was an electrical fire, but no electrical fire leaves the message ‘ _ You are lucky you weren’t home’ _ written in the team’s code on the pavement.

Ed has gone quiet, and Roy uses this momentary peace to unlock the door.

“And no one believes me when I say he is terrifying.” Ed mutters, as he shoves past Roy.

He watches Ed kick off his shoes, and fling his coat on to the nearest sofa. “I would invite you to stay, but I doubt you would appreciate the offer.” He says.

“Don’t you start deciding what I want.” Ed says. “If you want me gone, then say so, otherwise I’m staying.”

“Please, don’t--” He begins, and Ed snorts.

“Fucking hell! Don’t start with that. I don’t see you as a threat. I shouldn’t have seen you as a threat 3 years ago, but I didn’t know what I was doing, and my hormones were doing terrible things to my head.” Ed points a finger at him, “I already went over this; stop feeling guilty for something neither of us could control, and stop thinking that I am here because I’m deluded or some shit.” He crosses his arms, and stares him down.

“I have a spare room.” Roy says finally.

“Perfect!” Ed agrees, “Now show me this room, and I’ll show you how easy it is to fall asleep when you are dead tired.”

He isn’t even sure why he allows Ed to order him around his own home, but he has had a hell of a day, and the fewer choices he has to make right now, the better.

* * *

For the first time in literal years, Roy wakes up not feeling the least bit groggy. Gray skies soften the shadows of his room, and the distant clanging of kitchen utensils makes him wonder if he has finally been released from the mortal realm.

The clanging turns out to be the sound of Ed making pancakes, and not the sound of demons preparing his first meal in Hell. It’s a bit of a relief really, but he would be lying if he felt comfortable having Edward Elric cooking in his kitchen.

“Morning!” Ed says happily, “I need 5 more minutes, and then we’re ready to eat.” he flips a pancake and stirs something that looks like fruit syrup.

Roy watches in fascination at the young man he hadn’t seen in years, and whom he had so seriously abused during their last private encounter.

Ed seems to feel his train of thought, and he turns to glare at him, “I already had this discussion with Al. It's not Stockholm’s syndrome or any bullshit like that. I’ve had three years and 6 heats to think about this, and I know what I want.” 

There is a part of him that is desperate to know what it is that Ed wants, but the more he thinks about it, the more scared he becomes.

“Get some plates, and help me get all the toppings to the table.” Ed says, trying to balance the towering stack of pancakes in one hand, and a pot of tea in the other. “You look like you haven’t been eating much, and I need you to cooperate otherwise I’ll have to get Al involved, and you’ll believe me when I say he is the scariest thing in Amestris.”

This threat gets Roy reaching for some plates, and sitting down in his customary seat, while Ed locates some mugs, and fills them with tea. They move around the kitchen with ease, finding the syrup and digging out the jam preserves. The table is laden with food, and Roy watches as Ed piles the pancakes onto his own plate and proceeds to dig in. The sound of birdsong comes in through the open window, and the faint rustling of leaves breaks up the silence. Roy forces a few bites of food, before giving up and settling on just drinking his tea. Ed looks at him with furrowed brows, but says nothing, instead he slides his flesh leg to press up against Roy, and he lets it rest there without saying a word. 

Maybe this is what Ed wants. Quiet mornings and lots of food. Maybe this is something they can have, despite the pain they have suffered. Maybe they could be happy like this.

Roy realizes he is staring at Ed, but it's too late and Ed has already noticed. There is a moment when they simply stare at each other, but then Ed opens his mouth in a smile that gentles his features and makes his eyes glow. Roy feels something bubble up inside him, as he slowly lets himself smile back.

**Author's Note:**

> A/B/O dynamics are interesting. I wrote this as an angst bit exploring how easily everything could go wrong in such an AU. My headcanon is that Ed has been in love with Roy for years, but that rut incident really messed with him. After 3 years of self reflection he decides that he still wants Roy, and that this time they will start off on the right foot.


End file.
